A Proximate Thanksgiving
A Proximate Thanksgiving
How Can We Flip the Script on Nearness this Holiday Season During a Pandemic of COVID Denialism?
This Thanksgiving we did our best to keep it as simple as we could. We had a turkey and Kirsten, my wife, made sweet potato casserole from scratch, but the rest of our sides were out of boxes and cans. For the record, the meal was delicious. I should add that Kirsten also made, from scratch, some amazing cinnamon rolls for breakfast which were a big hit. We watched the parade, but the magic with which I remember it from my youth was gone. From the lip-synced performances to the continued cognitive dissonance required to consume entertainment that will almost certainly result in COVID exposure, illness, and possibly death, the experience was surreal.
This seems like a fitting metaphor for our times. So many of us continue to act out familiar parts in a no longer familiar play. The script has been rewritten mid-performance and it has become a life or death affair. If we want to survive to the end, we must improvise. Shockingly, given every incentive include the health and well-being of our own children, many of us refuse to adapt. Here I must make note of my privilege and power. Staying with this play analogy, I said above that it has become a life or death affair, but for those with marginalized identities this has always been the case. I know and lament this fact and long to see this particular script flipped. I know that to do so will be disruptive to the privilege and power that I enjoy, and to the extent that I’m able, I accept this.
We enjoyed the rest of the spectacle on Thursday. We napped to football on TV. We watched a Christmas movie. There was some small measure of comfort in these familiar routines, but they felt somehow remote, as if we remain in a perpetual state of dissociation. This is the definition of trauma, I know, to be unable to stop or escape from a terrible experience, to experience time differently in the midst of it, to take leave of one’s senses as a means of self-preservation.
The most frightful part of it remains the most obvious, and the part which it seems most Americans remain willfully ignorant to. There actually is a way out of this dreadful experience, or at least a way to mitigate some of its worst effects. We must first acknowledge that COVID is not only not over but continues to kill and disable far too many people every day. And we must be willing to take collective action and see our individual actions as part of a collective response. High quality masks and improved ventilation work to limit the spread of not only COVID but flu and RSV. Remote work options for those that can perform their duties from home and tele-health and virtual meetings almost certainly save lives. Other measures matter too and for a great COVID reading list, go here.
We may not be performing the play that we signed up for, but with a little improvisation we can adapt to our ever changing script. Lives depend on it. I’m cynical about our willingness to do the necessary work to save ourselves, but I haven’t given up hope…yet.